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Anxiety

Supporting Children and Young People With Anxiety

Anxiety is a normal human emotion. Everyone—children, teens and adults—experiences worry or fear at times. It often appears during changes, new experiences, or when something feels uncertain or challenging. In many cases, anxiety is a natural response and not a sign of a mental health problem.

However, some children and young people can feel anxiety more intensely or more often, and it can start to get in the way of everyday life. This page offers simple, practical strategies for parents and carers, as well as guidance on when it may be time to seek extra help.

Why Anxiety Happens

Anxiety can be triggered by many things, including:

  • New situations (school moves, exams, friendships, activities)
  • Changes in routine
  • Sensory overload
  • Feeling unsure what to expect
  • Past negative experiences
  • Worrying thoughts that feel hard to control

You don’t need to know the cause to offer support—often the most important thing is helping the child feel safe, understood and equipped with ways to cope.

Practical Strategies for Parents and Carers

Your calmness helps them regulate.

  • Acknowledge their feelings: “It makes sense you feel nervous about this.”
  • Avoid dismissing: “There’s nothing to worry about.” Validation does not increase anxiety—it helps reduce it.

Tip: Model coping by speaking your own strategies aloud:
“I’m feeling a bit stressed, so I’m taking a slow breath to help my body calm down.”

Your calmness helps them regulate.

  • Acknowledge their feelings: “It makes sense you feel nervous about this.”
  • Avoid dismissing: “There’s nothing to worry about.” Validation does not increase anxiety—it helps reduce it.

Tip: Model coping by speaking your own strategies aloud:
“I’m feeling a bit stressed, so I’m taking a slow breath to help my body calm down.”

Structure and preparation help reduce worry.

  • Use visual schedules or a simple daily plan.
  • Talk through what will happen before an event or change.
  • Break tasks into small, manageable steps.

For younger children: visual cues (pictures, timers).
For teens: shared calendars, checklists, and planning apps.

Structure and preparation help reduce worry.

  • Use visual schedules or a simple daily plan.
  • Talk through what will happen before an event or change.
  • Break tasks into small, manageable steps.

For younger children: visual cues (pictures, timers).
For teens: shared calendars, checklists, and planning apps.

Different strategies work for different ages. A few helpful ones:

Breathing Techniques

  • “Smell the flower, blow the candle”
  • Box breathing (inhale 4 – hold 4 – exhale 4 – hold 4)

Grounding Techniques

  • 5-4-3-2-1 senses game (name 5 things you can see, etc.)
  • Focus on feet on the ground, hands on a surface

Movement and Sensory Breaks

  • Walking, stretching, jumping
  • Quiet corners, fidget objects, listening to music

Journaling or Drawing

  • Helps older children express thoughts
  • Helps younger children externalise feelings without pressure to talk

Different strategies work for different ages. A few helpful ones:

Breathing Techniques

  • “Smell the flower, blow the candle”
  • Box breathing (inhale 4 – hold 4 – exhale 4 – hold 4)

Grounding Techniques

  • 5-4-3-2-1 senses game (name 5 things you can see, etc.)
  • Focus on feet on the ground, hands on a surface

Movement and Sensory Breaks

  • Walking, stretching, jumping
  • Quiet corners, fidget objects, listening to music

Journaling or Drawing

  • Helps older children express thoughts
  • Helps younger children externalise feelings without pressure to talk

When children understand what they’re feeling, it becomes less frightening.

You might explain:

  • Anxiety is a body alarm designed to keep us safe.
  • Sometimes the alarm goes off even when there is no danger.
  • There are ways to turn the alarm down.

For younger children:
Use stories, metaphors, or characters (e.g., “Your worry monster is being very loud today”).

For teens:
Use simple explanations of physical reactions (heart racing, fast breathing) and how coping skills help.

When children understand what they’re feeling, it becomes less frightening.

You might explain:

  • Anxiety is a body alarm designed to keep us safe.
  • Sometimes the alarm goes off even when there is no danger.
  • There are ways to turn the alarm down.

For younger children:
Use stories, metaphors, or characters (e.g., “Your worry monster is being very loud today”).

For teens:
Use simple explanations of physical reactions (heart racing, fast breathing) and how coping skills help.

Avoiding what makes them anxious can make anxiety stronger. Instead:

  • Break challenges into small steps
  • Move at the child’s pace
  • Celebrate effort, not just success

Example:
If a child is anxious about school, their steps might be:

  1. Walking past the school
  2. Going into the playground for a few minutes
  3. Staying for a short part of the day
  4. Building up to full days at the child’s pace

Avoiding what makes them anxious can make anxiety stronger. Instead:

  • Break challenges into small steps
  • Move at the child’s pace
  • Celebrate effort, not just success

Example:
If a child is anxious about school, their steps might be:

  1. Walking past the school
  2. Going into the playground for a few minutes
  3. Staying for a short part of the day
  4. Building up to full days at the child’s pace

Consistency helps children feel secure.

  • Regular sleep routines
  • Balanced meals
  • Time for rest, hobbies, and connection
  • Predictable transitions (bedtime routine, morning routine)

Consistency helps children feel secure.

  • Regular sleep routines
  • Balanced meals
  • Time for rest, hobbies, and connection
  • Predictable transitions (bedtime routine, morning routine)

It’s time to seek additional support if anxiety:

  • Interferes with daily life, such as school attendance, friendships, learning, or hobbies
  • Causes physical symptoms (frequent stomach aches, headaches, sleep problems)
  • Leads to distress that doesn’t improve with home strategies
  • Results in avoidance that keeps increasing
  • Causes panic attacks
  • Triggers big emotional outbursts or shutdowns regularly
  • Affects eating, personal care, or safety

Trust your instincts—parents often notice early when something isn’t right.

It’s time to seek additional support if anxiety:

  • Interferes with daily life, such as school attendance, friendships, learning, or hobbies
  • Causes physical symptoms (frequent stomach aches, headaches, sleep problems)
  • Leads to distress that doesn’t improve with home strategies
  • Results in avoidance that keeps increasing
  • Causes panic attacks
  • Triggers big emotional outbursts or shutdowns regularly
  • Affects eating, personal care, or safety

Trust your instincts—parents often notice early when something isn’t right.